Dear Internet... If you haven't been around long... then let me clue you in... i. dont. public. speak. I blog! :) So when I was asked to speak at the ladies event we had a few weeks ago... I decided to basically write out a blog post. It was the only way I could organize my thoughts. The funny thing is.. I kept wanting to address you {internet} and add hashtags to add some sassiness to my post. Then it hit... I have to SPEAK this. {insert nervous tummy} anyway... I basically practiced so much that I could have potentially recited my notes in my sleep.
Nonetheless... below is basically word for word what I said during the introduction of the evening. I was asked to give an overview of the topic of community: serving the church and building relationships. I will tell you that my first draft of notes were 6 pages long... I had to cut it in half to make my 20 minute slot... needless to say I have a LOT to say about this topic.
So incase you missed it... here it is:
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First of all I want to say that we are so excited that each
of you are here for our 2nd annual spring ladies
event. The ladies that sit on this
committee: myself, Michelle, Candace, Monica, Katharine,
and of course the lovely Kandy… we love the planning process for this
event.
Potentially the sweetest part of the planning process is the
brainstorming session. It was my
favorite part last year… and proved the same this year. Basically, we sit in a room with a
whiteboard and Monica’s notepad and Kandy starts asking us ‘What do the women
of the church need?; What do we feel is lacking?; What do we desire/need?’ and the whiteboard starts to fill
with words and phrases that pour out from our hearts.
Some of the thoughts that were brainstormed during this
year’s session were things like: more community (wide AND deep); support
(living life together, being intentional with one another); intergenerational
relationships; mentoring; building relationships; conflict management; barriers
we set for ourselves in relationships (sticking to only those in same stage of
life as us; fighting cultural and fleshly tendencies for
independence-distancing ourselves from others); equipping and service.
At our next meeting we started to see how so many of these
things have to do with the other.
I love how the Lord works these details out… and the way He brings to
light the common thread to each of us. It is so beautiful. As you know, the committee determined that the idea of
community really encompasses everything we listed during our brainstorming
session. We realized that within
this category we really listed two major themes (serving the church and building
relationships) that really encompass most of the other items we listed.
I’ll spare you the details of the rest of the planning
process, even though each step is just as sweet as the brainstorming session. I’m not quite sure how it happened… but
at some point during the planning process it was decided that I would give the
introduction for this evening. Let
me just say… public speaking is not a strong quality of mine. However, I believe the Lord stretches
us outside of our comfort zone for a reason… so here I am… being stretched.
But hey, at least I get to talk to you about community…
which is something so beautiful to me.
I love community… it has been a huge part of my spiritual growth over
the last 10 years. More
specifically about 5 years ago Launch {young adult ministry} was born. I was a new-grad and newly wed who was
eager to get plugged in and excited for the opportunity for this young adult
bible study.
I thought I had a perfect understanding on community and
what godly community looked like, until about a year or so into Launch. That’s when I really started to see
community being formed in the sweetest possible way. Let me tell you a little bit about this ministry – it
is geared towards 18-29 year olds (and I’m not sure what will happen when I
turn 30… Launch may become geared towards 30-40 year olds - watch for the announcement). We meet on Thursday nights at 7 and
have about an hour or so where we talk about life and share prayer requests and
spend time in prayer for one another.
We spend another hour and ½ or so for the teaching/discussion section of
the evening and then around 9-9:30 most of us go out to dinner where we spend
another hour or more in fellowship – we are Baptists so food is a natural
ingredient to our fellowship.
Sometimes we talk about the teaching from that night… sometimes we talk
about life. I believe this is a
key to community… investing.
Community TAKES TIME.
It is an investment. If we
met at church every Thursday night at 7 and left at 8:30 after the prayer and
teaching time and went home… I’m sure there would still be an element of
community. BUT I can promise you
that it would not be as sweet as the one that has been built and continues to
build through Launch.
Now… this isn’t a sales pitch for Launch… however, if you
need a sales pitch – see me later because I have A LOT more I could share about the goodness that is Launch. But this evening is about
community. I couldn’t stand here
this evening and talk about this subject without brining up Launch. This ministry, the people, the
teaching, the discussions, the meals we’ve shared, the questions we aren’t
afraid to ask, to comments we aren’t afraid to say, the feelings we aren’t
afraid to share… it has all shaped me and my spiritual growth so much over the
last several years. It has bled
over to my other relationships and communities.
So on Sunday nights we’ve been going through 2nd
Timothy and it has been so beautiful to learn more and more about the
relationship Paul and Timothy had with one another. During one
particular Sunday night sermon Pastor Bret talked specifically about their
relationship… and about how we often times personalize with others through
social events… we don’t struggle through sin together like Paul and Timothy
did. We talked about how much
community we are missing out on when we instead hide our sin because we are
embarrassed or ashamed so we just put on the ‘church face’ and go about our
Sunday. How much intimate
community we are missing out on… it seriously hurts my heart. At the end of the message, Pastor Bret
asked us to consider the following:
Why don't we get personal?
- We will get hurt... people won't meet
expectations
- By exposing our hearts to others...
gives them ammo to use against us
- We live in 'what ifs' of getting
personal
- Maybe we don't want others to know the
details of our lives/hearts
- Maybe this type of relationship was
never modeled for me and so it has been avoided
Some additional questions
to ponder internally:
Why are you afraid of letting someone that close?
Are we scared of judgment from the other person?
Will they really be as honest to me as I am to them?
Are we embarrassed about what
information/struggles/weaknesses they might find out about us?
Are we afraid of the time it will require? The investment?
What is it that keeps you from letting others in… in deep?
I’m sure some of you are sitting there thinking, ‘Raylene,
you don’t understand… my situation is different...’ or ‘I’m an introvert…’ I know all of the excuses… I wrote most
of them. But that is what they
are… EXCUSES. Every community has
individuals in so many different situations in life, and different
personalities. The communities I’m
a part of have more introverts than extroverts – if you can believe that! I’m out numbered. But it is probably good b/c I can talk
a-lot! J
It is beautiful how we balance each other out. I’m excited to hear from Kandy
in a little bit about this subject.
Tonight we are also going to have a panel of ladies that are
going to talk to us about serving the church. These are ladies who serve in our body and do it well. Some have been serving for years… some
started serving the second they walked through the front doors the first
time. They are going to discuss
service with us and I’m so excited to hear from these experts.
There is
something powerful about the relationships that are built around serving the
church alongside another believer.
Scott and I have been serving in the youth ministry for about 4 years
now and there are so many relationships we have been blessed with through serving
in this manner… that other wise wouldn’t be there. I think of the youth students… let me tell you- we have a
great group of students. They love
the Lord and they love each other and I am truly blessed to get to watch them
grow. There is something so
sweet about getting to have students that are kids of the youth leaders that
lead when I was in youth here at SummitWoods. I also think of the other leaders… Scott and I serve with
Chad and Tracey, Heather and Glenn and Tommie Anne.. Scott
and I have learned so much from each of them. If we weren’t serving together in the youth ministry… we
would have no reason to get to know them… and the perspective, the wisdom, the
godliness that we cherish in each of them … I can’t imagine not having
that. I know that serving in the
youth group is different than some other serving opportunities within the
church… but is it really that much different in terms of the opportunity to
build community? I really don’t
think so..
Similarly…within the committee for this event, we all represent
different stages of life, and that makes this group of ladies so dear to my
heart. I’m so thankful for each of
them and the relationships I’m getting to build through planning these events
with them. Otherwise I potentially
wouldn’t have a relationship with them.
Our paths would not naturally cross. I hope you realize how important being intentional is… to
serving the church and building lasting relationships.
I am so looking forward to this evening… this is a topic
that is dear to my heart and I couldn’t be more excited to hear from Kandy and
the ladies on the ‘service’ panel.
Let me pray for us as we get started this evening…
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I have so many notes from the evening that I could share... it was a blast and I was so encouraged and challenged through the conversation with the panel and the discussion Kandy had with us. It was so beautiful!!
Just a little side-note: I will be forced to take a little break because the time has come for Vinnie's eviction... next week is the day. So I'll have to take another little absence - but don't give up on me. I'll be back... with a pretty sweet scar too! :)
